If you’ve come here for a piece of sage wisdom from a spiritual guru, this ain’t the blog! I’m a bible teacher trying to figure out how to be a Jesus-follower when the world says white is black, right is wrong, and tapered jeans are all the rage. I’m just a girl who wants to draw the line!
Speaking of learning to draw lines, even the best of us fail. In moments of weakness, what was so right in our head ends up being so wrong in reality.
It was a combination of  my [pathetic] savings plan, [poor] time management, and [wanna be] inner fashionista that lied to me on Friday morning as I dressed for work.
Savings plan: Due to my calculations Bianca F. Juarez, you cannot go shopping or purchase anything new until 2012. Ergo, utilize the clothes in your closet.
Time Management: It’s Friiiiiday! Girl, there’s no traffic on the 5 freeway this early… take your time in the shower.
Inner Fashionista: Bianca Dahhhling, you look fabulous! Those pants are all the rage! Did you see Rihanna wearing them on the cover of Rolling Stones? D-I-E! It’s fabulous. And American Apparel is all about humanity so this goes with your whole helping the world bit!
I left my house without makeup on [read: just foundation and blush] and sat in Los Angeles traffic moving at the pace of molasses. It was on the freeway that I had an inner dialogue that went a little something like, WHAT IN THE WORLD AM I WEARING?!
This is NOT what I looked like
In my attempts to be a frugal fashionista, I get a big, fat F on my style card. First off, faux leather stretch pants only look good on Rihanna because she’s like 31 pounds and stands at 5’8”. I’m 5’3” and weigh… well, more than 31 pounds. I looked like the love child of RuPaul and Kim Kardashian. It was like the ugly child of two good looking people.
Did I mention I paired the pants with riding boots? Yes, riding boots?! Slap me. Hard.
Ok, ok, so let me get to the point of this blog entry. Lately a few people have mentioned they use this blog as their daily dose of bible. Instead of being flattered, I was frightened.
- NOTHING replaces the bible. Do not, and I repeat, do not use this in lieu of your bible! Just because there is a scripture or a tidbit of truth, that does not mean it should be your devotional time. Not even devotionals should count as your devotional time?! But that’s for another blog.
- There are days when I can fake-it-till-I-make it when it comes to fashion and pull off a somewhat stylish look. Buuuuuut there are days [read: weeks] where I hope against hope I can pull off a certain shirt or new style of shoe. And blogging is the same way. If I post something meaningful, awesome! It’s nothing short of a HolySpiritMiracle 🙂
If not and my theology is as tacky as a washed up pop star’s wardrobe, will you tell me? We all fall short. The question is how will we recover? Say WORD if you hear me!
PS: The next time I ask if my jeans make my butt look big, you better keep it real! Don’t make me look like a fool!
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