Church, circa 2008:
Him: Hey, I was wondering if maybe we could go get some coffee after church.
Me: [blink] Well, um… [blink, blink] uh, you know, I, um–no. I’m sorry.
Him: You don’t drink coffee?
Me: I’m sorry. You see, the whole thing is a little serious for me. Like, I have a busy schedule and serve in youth ministry and if the kids saw me, blah, blah, blahblahblah…
Somebody slap me. Hard.
There are, shall we say, uber sensitive Christians out there and I was (sometimes am) one of them. You know those people who ask for the seas to part, the heavens to open, and a divine voice to give us signs and wonders? Yes, Internet, that was/is/will be me.
I believe God can speak supernaturally if He so chooses. But the idea of dating in the Christian realm is complicated to say the least. If I’m completely honest with you, I suck at it. Like really, really suck at it. I’m the last one to answer the questions for this week, but there are my thoughts:
Here are some caveats and suggestions which are important in protecting your reputation and heart:
- If someone is asking everyone and their mother out to coffee, they are a player. And you need your PhD*!
- If someone keeps asking you out but has not or does not want to have the DTR, they are not interested in making the relationship serious.
- If you know after one or two dates that you aren’t interested in the other person, be honest. Don’t waste your time and their money!
- If someone keeps asking you out but likes keeping things at a shallow level, it’s a serious case of DD*.
- If this is just a coffee date to get to know someone, there is NO reason why you should be holding hands, kissing, or more. Like my grandmother would say, don’t give away what men should work for.
- Have at least TWO standards: 1. Does this person have a JOB? 2. Does this person love JESUS? If not, this person isn’t ready to date. Period. The end.
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